I know.
I know what you’re going through.
I walked halfway across this bridge and I expect you to walk your half to meet me.
But I know the wind picked you up and threw you into the river as you rushed to meet me.
I’m watching you now swim against the current, trying to get back to land.
Then you can climb up the hill, get back to the road, and dodge the traffic.
As you rush back to the bridge so you can walk halfway to meet me.
—
I know how hard it is. To just be.
Life is so extremely difficult on its own, and then there are all of these things making it EVEN HARDER?!
I understand your frustration.
I feel your pain.
I know.
I Didn’t Always Know
For most of my life, I was an asshole. I’m still an asshole.
It’s hard to know what it’s like until you go through it yourself.
When you know someone is standing halfway across the bridge, waiting for you, and you just keep getting set back.
And they don’t see it.
They are just expecting you to be halfway across the bridge with them. They can’t see how much you’ve been thrown off track, having to work even harder to get to where you once were.
Only when you’re on the other side of this, and you feel the immense weight of judgment and disappointment because you failed to meet them halfway across the bridge… Only then do you realize, this is probably what’s holding most people back.
And you feel your heart break into a million billion pieces.
I resolved then to be so in tune with others in my life that I can sense where they’re at in their effort to get halfway across the bridge to meet me.
And so I am on the journey. The journey to be an Anti-asshole.
Anti-asshole
I’ve learned many powerful lessons over the years. Some from experience, some from observation, and some from spirit (more on this another time).
One of the biggest ones is to be more human to others.
In this modern life, humanity can be easily stripped away.
A MAGA lover is hard to see as a human. Unfortunately, their rage and disdain for many of the things I love make me boil up inside. I think that’s also how MAGA lovers feel about ANTIFA anarchists.
When you wear a uniform (of ideas, or of a group, of a government, of a skin color, of a culture, or of …), your individuality can be stripped away. Stereotypes can be justified. Broad sweeping actions, as well as laws, regulations, and systems, can be applied. An enemy can be made out of thin air through these practices.
Even bad guys have families. People who love(d) them. Parents who put all their hopes and dreams into them.
It’s not easy. But if we can be just a little more human to each other, it could go a long way.
So I’ve resolved myself to be a bit more human to other humans.
I’m Not Just Standing Here, Waiting for You
When you watch someone fall off of a bridge, do you just stand by?
No.
You rush to help.
I’m not just standing here.
I’m trying to see you. To really see you.
I’m trying to throw you a rope.
I’m actively cheering you on for all the progress you’re making.
I am flagging down the boats in the river so they can pick you up.
I’m waving at the cars, trying to get them to slow down and become an ally instead of a threatening enemy.
And I am preparing myself to walk further than halfway.
No One Is Perfect
I fail as much as everyone else. Probably more.
I am certain I’m missing some people’s struggles. Most people’s struggles…
It’s right there in front of me, but I am just blind to it.
So the point of this letter is to say, I’m trying.
I’m trying to be conscious of where you’re at in your journey, and I’m also trying to offer as many opportunities as possible to help you get to me faster.
I’m trying to see you. With my friendly little hello, my constant texts and calls, my persistence in trying to hang or get to know you, my little stories to relate to your experiences, and my constant questions about you and yours.
I’m trying.